Living in a physical body is tough. There always seems to be problems: my knees hurt...I'm hungry...I need to take a shower...I feel sick...I have to do the dishes...situations like that, all of which take time and effort. Sometimes I feel so tired, all I want to do is stay in bed. The weakness in my body seems to reflect the weakness I feel in my soul. The strength of my will isn't enough.
Should I rest, then? Is that a waste of time when I could be drawing, writing, exercising, or socializing? Will I ever be able to rest without guilt?
The body can be like an obstacle. Riddled with various problems like a complex machine...how can I accomplish anything if I'm too tired to function? Though I didn't go to bed particularly late last night, I slept until almost noon. Maybe I just needed the sleep, but I feel off today.
While falling asleep, I believe an evil spirit tormented me; I kept waking up full of fear, with horrible, violent thoughts entering my mind. Then I told the spirit to leave in the name of Jesus, and I felt it depart. After the presence left the room I felt peaceful. The thoughts went away, and I quickly fell asleep.
Being half asleep seems to sharpen my ability to sense spirits.
Once I heard that we shouldn't directly fight against demons because then we become vulnerable to attacks. Though I didn't trust the pastor I heard that from, perhaps there is some truth to what he said. Then again, even Satan speaks the truth sometimes...albeit in a twisted way, which is no different from lying.
Yet I have noticed that after I cast out demons or break curses and strongholds, I'm met with backlash that can be quite frightening. Maybe I'm in over my head....The scary, violent thoughts started after breaking generational curses.
Does the backlash mean I shouldn't break the curses, though? The alternative is accepting the curses, so I don't think so. Christ is stronger than any demonic power, and He shall protect me.
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